Animal Crackers
by eldestmiddle
Summary: And they all followed one another. AxelRoxas


**Animal Crackers**

Part 1?

**Disclaimer:** Not mine. I'm too poor to own Kingdom Hearts.

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Axel really wanted to get rid of his stalker. _Really_ badly. Because it was really cutting into _his_ stalking when he was avoiding her, he gave up on avoiding her.

Like, Larxene was sexy and all but he already had his eye on someone else and it really upped the chances of getting caught when there was another person along.

It was a blond stalking a redhead stalking a blond. Later, Larxene dragged along her new boyfriend, which Axel thought was really cruel. It became a crying pinkette stalking a blond stalking a redhead stalking a blond.

No wonder Roxas caught on. Everyone else did.

Axel nearly had a heart attack when Roxas showed up on his door step. He really did have a heart attack when Roxas told him that he was creepy and gross and would you stop freakin' following me. Roxas's kind twin brother called 911, stayed with Axel all the way to the hospital, was there when Axel woke up, and patiently listened to Axel's sobbed out story. Roxas, it turned out, had walked away before he even hit the ground. Not ran, walked.

Sora then dealt with his hysterics.

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Sora was an angel although you had to wonder what his mother was high on when she named her children.

_Cloud,_

_Sora_

and since she seemed to be unable to think up two names in rapid succession, she went for a bad anagram,

_Roxas_

Axel wanted to cry, thinking about Roxas. Sora had apologetically visited him after school, every day. He gave Axel updates on Roxas which sure beat hanging around below Roxas's window, trying to listen in. But whenever Axel asked what Roxas thought of him, Sora would just avert his eyes and say,

_"At least he knows you exist now…"_

That was not the answer he wanted. He was quickly falling into a sort of emo-like mood. That pair of scissors a nurse left on the bedside had been looking quite good for the past three days. He shakily picked it up when he heard a soft cry.

There was Roxas, staring at him with disgust. He turned to Sora, who was behind him.

"You want me to be buddies with an emo stalker?"

With this said, Roxas, once again, walked away. Axel gave a hoarse cry and tried to stab his own heart with the scissors while Sora wrestled them away from him and yelled for Roxas to come back. Roxas came back only to confirm that Sora wasn't hurt than walked away.

Oh yeah, Larxene found someone else to admire. Even his stalkers were leaving him now.

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The sun was shining, the birds were chirping, the nice girl-next-door was singing and Axel was on Roxas's bed. He reverently touched the star-speckled bedspread and gazed around the chaos. It was beautiful, even the week-old laundry piled in one corner.

Sora had invited Axel over to his house after he had gotten out of the hospital then dumped him in Roxas's bedroom, saying that he needed to clean his before letting Axel in. Axel spent a blissful twenty minutes in that room before Sora came back. When the door opened, Axel sprang towards Sora, screaming, _"I love you!__"_. Then, he engaged Sora in a _totally_ platonic liplock. After he lifted his face from Sora's, he saw a jabbering blonde pressing himself back against the opposite wall.

_Oh, shit._

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Sora was a little less than pleased at Axel for scaring off his friend. He was even less pleased when Tidus told all of his other friends. Axel worried for a while that it had affected his and Sora's friendship but Sora didn't really act any different and spent just as much time with Axel as he did before the kiss.

Sora was very understanding.

Unfortunately, the same could not be said of Roxas.

Roxas was furious that Axel had gotten his stalker claws into Sora and was corrupting him. This led to a confrontation in the abandoned alleyway of Axel's dreams. Axel noticed that Sora had morphed from an "okay" brother to "beloved twin" in Roxas's enraged mind. He also noticed that it was very arousing to be pressed up against a wall by an angry Roxas threatening to shove things up his ass. Roxas noticed too.

Axel was punched in the eye and trashed in a Dumpster to contemplate the hardships of being in love.

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AN: Will I do a part 2? No one knows. Oh, and did anyone else notice how extremely… odd Roxas's room was in KH2? There were a lot of… stars. Sora's a complete angel right now but that's only because Axel is deeply unhappy. If your friend is crying most of their day, you usually don't smack them and say shut up... but you do eventually later. Not something I really put my heart into but it's trying to get me back in the fanfic frame of mind.


End file.
